Saturday, September 25, 2010

Looking for a breakthrough signing strangers



Strange stranger in conversation is a major oral communication difficulties, handled well, can hit it off, Brief Encounter; not handled properly, can lead to lot of eye contact, awkward silence.

Living in a hotel on business recently and witnessed a live show: a first, but I have been living leisurely in bed watching TV, one by one before me and live, down bag, a little swab of times, rushed a cup of strong tea, side products from the side of those who came before me: "Master to a long time to listen?" "than the first guests to the moment." He was reading my side, pointing his mouth. "Ting Kouyin not the Northern people ah?" "Oh, Shandong Zaozhuang people!" Ah, Zaozhuang is a good place, ah! Primary school when I was in the "Railway Guerrillas" comic strip on the know. Zaozhuang a trip three years to go, but also a considerable interest has been playing with it. "After hearing this, immediately to customers who interested in Zaozhuang, Zaozhuang and two from the guerrillas on railway opened, and that intimacy, I am afraid I do not know exact details of people come to believe that they are a bargain. Then is give each other a card, dine together, sleep still in their side before the parties actually signed a contract to bring the word: Zaozhuang guest ordered a group of Southern style in a leather factory barrel; southern Jiangsu, where guests get a group of guests from Zaozhuang reasonable price bargaining coal. they met, talked and success, is that they have found the "Zaozhuang," "Railway guerrillas" are familiar with this common ground.

How can we find common ground between strangers do the same?

1, inspected the facial expressions, a stranger to find common with the

A person's psychological state, spiritual pursuits, life-loving, etc., are all more or less in their facial expressions, clothing, conversation, manners and so on to do well, as long as you are observant, you will find common ground. Take a veterans meet the same stranger, position just behind the driver. Car broke down soon after the road, the driver of a car truck through busy not fix. The stranger proposed to oil line and then check again the driver, the driver gave it a once skeptical way to really find the cause. The veteran felt that his unique skills may be learned from the forces of. Then test: "You spent time in the army, right?" "Ah, staying in 2067." "Oh, we two should be considered to be comrades in arms then. You military service, where troops ?"..... . So that up to strangers to talk, said that later they became friends. This is observed each other after the discovery had been a soldier of this common ground. Of course, the police found what facial expressions, but also fun loving with their combination of his interest in this also, the atmosphere is possible to break the silence. Otherwise, find common ground, it also found nothing to say, or about 12 on the "stuck."

2, in order to test if exploration and reconnaissance in common.

Two strangers on the value, in order to break the silence of the situation, speak, is the first, was to greet the opening, ask each other origin, identity, from which access to information; some accent by listening to words, words, surveillance of each other; others to action opening, side to help each other some much-needed help to do something, then try to test the side; and some are even asking for a light smoke and other features can be found, look for open oral communication situation. 2 Chronology of a county from the car, sitting on a bench. One of them asked, "Where I get off?" "In the end, you?" "Me too, you go to Nanjing, where?" "I went to Shanxi Road, Nanjing, relatives something, you're here are you?" "Is not , I was visiting relatives from Nanjing to. "After the two sides of the" fire detection ", the two sides of the county are familiar with, understanding of Nanjing, are relatives of the common ground to clear. After the two men found common ground on the other side very pumping machine, got off the other side is also a reciprocal invitation to a guest. This harmonious effect appears to be accidental, and indeed there is the inevitable result: the "fire detection", found common ground, while driving to the Shenzhen Special Economic Zone Office of the effects produced.

3, listening person, guessing common.

Friends drop in for you to encounter a stranger here, as are familiar to both the owner, immediately came forward for both parties, tell about the relationship between the parties and the masters of their own identity, work unit, or even personality, hobbies, etc. so, careful people can be found immediately from the introduction, and they have nothing in common with each other. One is the County Price Bureau of the Chief and a "County" teachers to meet in a friend's house, and the owner this was introduced to strangers, they soon discovered that the students are masters of this common ground, immediately around the "students" is a breakthrough in a conversation, mutual knowledge and understanding of, and even up to become intimate. That which is important when listening to introduction of careful understanding of each other, find common ground and then extended in the conversation, continue to discover new topics of common concern.

4, try to figure out conversation, and explore common ground.

In order to find their common ground with strangers, who may require communication with the care of other people talking, try to figure out, you can own in each other and try to figure out each other's words when talking, and found common ground. In a department store in Guangzhou, one of the attendants in the South China Sea Fleet, said: "Will you show me that thing." Also "I" as the dictionary might not find authentic Northern dialect. Another man in Guangzhou is a Northern army service. After listening to the former remark, also pointing to the shelves of a commodity on the salesperson said something similar, then, two infiltration between the lines all the words northern Jiangsu local flavor, so that the two strangers a laugh, to buy their own buying something out of the store to talk up question from the home to the troops, from the present task of talking about the road traveled over the years, introduces the future plan. Side of the body in a foreign land a pair of fellow's affectionate enthusiasm, knowledge of how people will not believe this is because the other one dialect and try to figure out the result. Shows that carefully try to figure out the other side of the conversation was indeed the two sides can find common ground so that passers-by into a strange acquaintance, become friends.

5, step by step in depth, excavated in common.

Find common ground is not too difficult, but it can only be the initial stage of the conversation required. With chat-depth, more and more common. In order to talk to each other more useful, we must dig deeper for a common step by step, to wish fulfilled. A vacation of college students and a comrade in the work of the Court, in a common meal with friends, being introduced by the master, the stranger talked together, and slowly find two unhealthy trends in society's views have common ground, unwittingly started the discussion, they are from the appalling social phenomenon, about the soil and roots produced from the role of democracy and the rule of law, about the expectations of the party and the country. The more talk about more in-depth, on both sides from the more reduced the more, the more common ground on both sides more. Both sides later spoke to the students understand that the community understand the Court's comrades and the masses of information outside the requirements, and enhance the consciousness of every effort to correct unhealthy tendencies are beneficial.

Are still many ways to find common ground, such as facing a common living environment, common tasks, common direction of the road, living habits, etc., as long as carefully find a stranger could say nothing about the situation is not difficult to break .

Wish the world could meet a stranger as ever, passionately devoted.







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